Here’s something everyone ought to try, if you’re lucky ... old age! It’s a hoot and full of surprises. What joy it is! Something new happens almost daily.

To begin with, you have to approach it carefully, as it can bite you suddenly and without warning. Let’s get started on this marvelous journey. First, I think God must have a great sense of humor, He’s got to be a real knee slapper, and he’s been working on me for a number of years now.

I was going along just fine until I tore up my knee when I slipped on a wet floor. Things went downhill after that because my left leg got real skinny, kind of like a peg leg. This led to other injuries, and the fun started. It got hard to keep up with everything but I figured, that’s life. So I went to bed at 55 and woke up at 65+. It happens that fast.

Remember when you couldn’t wait to grow up? It was slow motion and time dragged on. When you reach a certain age, everything speeds up, and what a ride it is. You start to think of ways to slow it down like going to prison. That’s got to be a drag, but you will become extremely alert and each day is an eternity.

One day, you wake up and see spots before your eyes and think....brain tumor! The doctor tells you it’s normal and they’re called “floaters”. I got a little glass bottle, and kept it with me, so I could catch them, with a quick swipe, and put them in the bottle. I know it worked because they all disappeared after that.

Anyway, here’s the best way to handle the aches, soreness and pain. Be married to a loving wife for a long, long time. She’ll look at you and see the young guy she married long ago, and at night you’ll squeeze each others hand or give a gentle touch that says “We’re in this together,” and all the problems go away.

Patrick Choate

Garrison

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